A couple of weeks ago, I published a tongue in cheek post poking fun at Twilight and it’s fans…and quickly, my blog’s hits rocketed to new heights…which isn’t exactly saying much. It revealed to me that there’s a bigger world out there than I realized, a world that follows this Twilight stuff, and avidly. It’s a world far bigger than those looking for the random musings of a recently licensed attorney.
I don’t know if this is because there are more women online than men, or if Twilight fans (aka “Twifans” or “Twihards,” if they are really devoted) are more avid searchers of the web for content on their favorite movie and book, but there is a lot of interest in Stephanie Meyer‘s vampires.
On the other hand, I suppose it could be all the disenchanted men who have realized that there’s nothing they could ever do to measure up to the beautiful Edward or the ba-zillion abdominal muscles of the canine-like Jacob (aka “the human muscle chart”). I have no doubt that there are a lot of those out there, too, and they are glad for any excuse to mock and laugh at the movement–because a movement is almost what it is–behind vegi-vampires and their virginal girlfriends.
Which ever group you fall into, be it Twifan or disgruntled boyfriend, here’s one more piece of the Twilight world for you to chew on (no pun intended).
Here’s “how it should have ended.” Twilight, that is.
And that’s how it should have ended.
(Thanks to How It Should Have Ended and YouTube)
Posted in funny, Nothing to do with the law
Tagged eclipse, HISHE, How it should have ended, New Moon, parody, Stephanie Meyer, Team Edward, Team Jacob, Twifan, Twihard, twilight
Ok, I promise this will be the last thing I say about the Twilight phenom on this blog. And I would say anymore, except that a few more things popped up over the weekend, and I thought they merited noting here.
During her Supreme Court confirmation hearing on Wednesday, Solicitor General Elena Kagan was jokingly asked by Sen. Amy Klobuchar, Democrat of Minnesota, for her thoughts on a particularly pressing issue.
Noting the “incredibly grueling day” Ms. Kagan had on Tuesday, Ms. Klobuchar remarked, “I guess it means you missed the midnight debut of the third ‘Twilight’ movie last night.” After some laughter, she added: “We did not miss it in our household, and it culminated in three 15-year-old girls sleeping over at 3 a.m.”
Ms. Kagan said she was not able to see “Eclipse,” but Ms. Klobuchar nonetheless continued, “I keep wanting to ask you about the famous case of Edward versus Jacob or the vampire versus the werewolf.”
“I wish you wouldn’t,” Ms. Kagan said.
“I know you can’t comment on future cases,” Ms. Klobuchar said. “So I’ll leave that alone.”
(via New York Times and Above the Law)
Yesterday, I put up a post with a clip from David Edelstein’s review on Eclipse, along with a funny picture of some fully grown women screaming for Twilight (which I have sense learned means they are “Twihards.” Or “Twilighters?”). I wrote the post as a tongue in cheek jab at the new movie, wildly successful in a way I could wish for my own literary scratchings only in my most delusional dreams. Needless to say, I assumed, as usual, that my only audience would be the 3 people who usually read this blog (me, my mother, and perhaps some agent at the NSA…).
Boy, was I in for a surprise. Within just a couple of hours, my hits had rocketed through the roof. Suddenly, people were hitting the link like crazy.
Kind of weird, eh? Weird, unless you are a Twilight fan, which, for about .zero point six eight seconds, I almost became, if just out of commercial self-interest. I think that there are just a lot more people out there who would rather read about Twilight than the law, politics, or the other apparently uninteresting things that I punch at on this blog.
Maybe there’s a place in the market for me to do a blog on the law in Twilight? Vampires and werewolves have laws, too, right? Maybe…maybe not. However, if you see more posts that integrate insights on Team Edward or Team Jacob in an analysis of the first amendment, you’ll know why. People actually want to read that kind of stuff. Go figure.
Posted in Nothing to do with the law
Tagged blogging, David Edelstein, eclipse, law, NSA, Team Edward, Team Jacob, twilight, twilight blogs, vampires, werewolves
A big “Thank you” goes out to David Edelstein for nicely summarizing the exquisite work of modern fiction that is the phenomenon known as Twilight:
Back in Forks in The Twilight Saga: Eclipse, Bella and Edward repose in a meadow of soft-focus violets, in which Edward, his ivory skin bejeweled under the sun’s rays, asks Bella once again to be his bride. Bella stares at her lap and twists up her wide mouth on her long jaw and refuses to give him a firm yes or no until he promises to turn her into a vampire. Edward waffles. Better to wait a few weeks, he says, until after their high-school graduation. Restive, the virgin Bella wants to make love with Edward before he kills and resurrects her — so she’ll know what it’s like “while I’m still me.” But Edward is old-fashioned, having come of age a century earlier when “things were less … complicated.” Therefore, he says, they must wait until they’re married before they have sex and he kills her. As you can imagine, his pure-mindedness puts a strain on the relationship, and, also, there’s a werewolf at the door: Jacob the Human Muscle Chart, a hot-blooded Native American with no patience for tortured paleface bloodsucker Mormon-esque sexual circumlocutions. He wants Bella to choose him instead of Edward — or, as he puts it, “I want you to choose me instead of him.” Imprudently, he tries to steal a kiss, but she whomps him and sprains her hand. Jacob is chastened. Though bestial, he’s still a gentleman.
I mean, other than the millions of teenage girls and their mothers who have devoured the Twilight series like so much brain candy.
Are you going to see it? Or did you go see it at midnight last night?
Posted in Nothing to do with the law
Tagged Bella the empty vessel, brain candy for girls, David Edelstein, double standards, eclipse, Mormon, shannon hale, Team Edward, Team Jacob, twilight, virgins